Losing my Father

One way that I have always been able to sort out my feelings and work through my thoughts has been by writing.I have spent a long time attempting to write this post. Nothing that I am writing about has been easy, I wanted to apologize for not being on here as much as I usually am. The reason for that is that on October 6th, 2016 my father passed away.

 

When I was two years old my father was diagnosed with stage four cancer, and was finishing his treatment when I was about five or six years old. He spent most of my life in and out of good health, and these last few years he truly suffered. Even with twelve years on a feeding tube, and life harnessed to an oxygen tank my father never once complained and nurses who treated him were always so shocked to hear he never once took antidepressants. October 1st was the last time I saw my dad, that next day he went to bed and then never woke up. He spent 4 days in a coma-like state and then passed in peace on the 6th.

However this post isn’t going to be about all of his health issues. My dad was my best friend, for twenty-two years he was my rock as well as my hero, and he always will be. Ever since I was a little girl my father showed me how to be a good person, how to stay strong, and to always make people laugh. He was not only an amazing father to my sister and I, but also a loving and caring husband of 40 years. He coached my sister and I in tennis and softball, took us on camping trips, and made sure we always knew we were loved. My dad was always there for me, he was available at all hours of the day if I needed to call him or message him. If I ever needed anything or needed advice or just someone to make me smile I always knew where I could turn. Learning to cope with this change hasn’t been easy, there have been plenty of times where I go to send hi ma text or get to my parents house only to realize his chair is empty and his things are gone. As time has passed I have come to realize that losing him has been the hardest thing to even happen to myself and my family, but for him his suffering has ended and he is in a much better place and with me at all times in spirit. img_3728

I know this post is not very much exciting news, happy news, or a big beauty breakthrough but thank you so much for reading it.

 

 

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